The new school year has started, and I am left to give every waking second to my daughter, the housework and my gestating baby boy. I couldn't be happier! I am an introvert at heart. It seems that, without having to empathize with the problems of others, I don't really have anything to worry about. The days just fly by. I should feel... ashamed?... I guess most people would say that I should surround myself with people. Don't get me wrong. I have friends, but I don't interject myself into the lives of others. I don't care if no one thinks about me during the day. I know my husband thinks about me. I know my daughter thinks about me... or what I can do for her, rather! I am content with that. When the time comes that I can be alone with my daughter and an unfolded pile of laundry, or a bowl full of potatoes that need peeling, I feel really zen. I feel lucky to have such well defined goals. I feel indulged with the idea that I don't have to conquer anything too complex. I know that the time will come that I will need to battle a crisis, or cry for the persecuted of the world, but today I don't have to do that.
For most of my life, I have been raised to believe that I should be more social. I have never felt that way. I know that probably no one will read this blog, but that doesn't change the fact that I am writing it. I am probably just selfish, but I am okay with that too. Who am I hurting?
I went to Wal-Mart last night and had an hour, or so, to myself. I pondered whether, or not, to buy some rust-colored Better Homes and Gardens throw pillows. That was the extent of my evening. I didn't buy them, by the way. Pillows are another post, altogether!
I think I am finally happy with myself. I am in love with my babies and my husband. I love them and worry about them, and I know that they love me. What else do I need.
I know I sound way too happy. I am not on drugs. I will write plenty of "bitchy" posts. I figured I would give my readers, and myself, a break.
Well... My little girl is begging for Cheetos. Duty Calls!